Living in Wonder of a Child

This is kind of an addendum to the earlier post about the terrific twos.

I was just reading an article from a parenting magazine and it talked about the "numbers." As in, the number of children who are diagnosed with ADHD, have an eating disorder, have a learning disability, depression, etc. It is staggering. I don't remember ever going to school with so many children with problems when I was growing up. I realize they will tell me it is because they went undiagnosed, but... really?... Was there really something to diagnose? They all mostly seemed to do fine and most of them turned out to be perfectly okay, functioning adults.

This got me thinking about another issue I have had on my mind. Why must we constantly tell our children how bad they are? If it isn't the terrible twos, then it is the even more terrible threes, or it is the pre-teen years where they will talk back and hate us, or it is the high school years where it is full of angst and depression and more hating us. It is not often you hear our children's developmental years talked about in a positive light. We all know that children hear and understand way more than we think they do, so maybe some of these problems we are experiencing is our own d*mn fault. If all they hear is how bad they are going to be and how much they are going to hate us, then it must be perfectly right and acceptable to be bad and hate your parents. I definitely got that message when I was in high school. I was supposed to be dealing with angst and depression and I heard it loud and clear. It is not the time in our lives where we are learning to take on more responsibility and fighting to form our independence as adults, but our rebellious years (with a negative connotation on rebellion).

This is why I have started the way I plan to go on. We are going through the terrific twos and can't wait for the tumbling threes, and maybe some fun filled fours.

I look forward to appreciating Ari and telling her that she is becoming an amazing person as she grows and that I can't wait to see where she is going. I make a vow to her to cherish her individuality and independence as best I can so she will grow up strong and sure of her own worth. There will be times of strife, but that is just us butting heads over an issue and not what defines our relationship any more than my butting heads with my husband defines ours.

Here's to the adventure to come!